New Year

I have had a sucky year in many ways, except for work and my trip to Australia. I was unable to run most of the year, and have ended the year with a house full of people instead of getting shed of some like I wanted to.

The one thing I didn't do that I really should have was be better with money, and now times are bad and my 401k has tanked. I feel so out of control in many respects that I feel like my money is just a part of that. I waffle between just telling the world to go f themselves and hide out in my own little world, and wanting to be in control of my life again.

The first thing that has to go is all of the people who stay at my house. While we were gone, I expected my 2 extras to be here. But instead, there were people who dropped by and stayed. I didn't give explicit instructions to not have others here, so I guess they just assumed a free for all. There were cigarette butts and beer cans in my yard. This has GOT to go - we are going to have a come to Jesus meeting tonight and there will be no more unauthorized children here.

The second thing that has to go is the money I spend on even the authorized children. I have been making sure that all of these kids have spending money. I don't need to be told that this is counter productive. But I hate to see someone without a penny in their pocket while everyone else goes to McDonalds or whatever. I have justified this by saying that I feed them anyway, but I have got to start buying cheap snacks and making them work a little harder to find their own money.

So this year my goal is getting my money act together, but also doing what is necessary in the rest of my life so that I am not so frazzled.

This all basically boils down to avoiding procrastination, and procrastination is my specialty. I get waaay to worked up over unpleasant tasks, to the point that it is making me miserable. I get free mental health benefits, so maybe I will go to counseling to help me set goals for paperwork and money. Unlike some changes I know I can never make, I can set up my money stuff so that the budgeting and totalling is automatic. I am 95% there, and just need to take the time to finish setting it up, do the budgeting, pay attention every damn day, and not let these heathens around here take advantage of my soft spots.